a thought!!!

64191171af02dfcba8156d1097718aa0
English version at bottom
നിന്റെ ഓരോ വാക്കുകളും എന്റെ ആത്മാവിൽ നീ ഏൽപ്പിക്കുന്ന മുറിവുകളാണ്. നീ തീർത്ത ശരശയ്യയിൽ മൂകയായി കിടക്കുന്നു ഞാൻ, പ്രാണൻ പിടയുമ്പോഴും ജീവിക്കാനുള്ള എന്നിലെ ത്വര അടങ്ങുന്നില്ല. ഫീനിക്സ് പക്ഷിയുടെ ഉയർത്തെഴുനേൽപ് വെറും കെട്ടുകഥയാണ് എന്ന് ഞാൻ അറിഞ്ഞപ്പോഴേക്കും ഒടുവിലത്തെ അസ്ത്രത്തോടു ഒപ്പം എന്റെ പ്രാണനും പൊലിഞ്ഞു പോയി. ഒരുപാട് പേരുടെ പ്രതീക്ഷകൾ ബാക്കി വച്ചതിനു മാപ്പിരക്കാൻ പോലും എനിക്ക് ആയില്ല! തോറ്റുപോയി എന്ന തിരിച്ചറിവ് മാത്രമേ ഞാൻ ഈ ലോകത്തു ബാക്കി വച്ചുള്ളൂ…..

Every word of yours made fresh wounds in my soul.
I am lying silently on my death bed created by you.
My life is strangling now
But, the urge to live is still not subsided in me.
Rise of Phoenix  from the ashes became just a myth for me
I was with that realized truth
With the last arrow, my soul left my body.
I couldn’t apologize to anyone
For the unaccomplished expectations, many had for me. 
I left behind only one thought in the world
A thought of realization that “I FAILED” !

 

PS: this was written in November when I was going through a very bad emotional state. I am perfectly alright now and yeah, this is my 100Th post 🙂 

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About elaine

Dreaming to be a marine biologist someday..... Reading, writing, music, movies, travel, art etc. have been a part of my life from a long time. I hold madness....i love to share happiness and i am happy when i see smiles in the faces. I am weird and hybrid in my thoughts and tastes....Proud to be a Leo!

48 responses to “a thought!!!

  1. Beautiful. Sometimes the sadness invokes the best in some of us. You are a success with us…

    Liked by 2 people

  2. Vere onnum parayanilla it’s Deep!! Congratulations on the milestone Elaine 🙂

    Liked by 2 people

  3. Very well written !!
    Isnt it an irony that you started out thinking Phoenix is a myth but ended becoming one when you bounced back becoming perfectly normal again ?

    Liked by 3 people

  4. Elaine, your emotions are quiet evident from your post, I’m glad to hear you are better now.
    Bad times make us grow better and stronger, that’s only if we stand strong and continue going at that precise moment.

    Like

  5. the urge to live is still not subsided in me. I think it increases when you are aging. Love the life with all its mundane activity. You are having that passion that you can express with fine words. Its pleasure always to read and wait for the next piece. I will read Malayalam later. Merry Christmas. Remember Soul has no constrain of space. Regards.

    Liked by 1 person

  6. Beautiful Elaine and all ups and downs happen in our lives. It is us only who have to come out and move forward. Congratulations for your 100th post. Great poem, marvellous.👌👌👌👌👌👌

    Liked by 1 person

  7. I could not resist commenting. Exceptionally well written!

    Like

  8. Ohh.. Great .. One .. Sometimes our emotions in real life help us write things much better ..

    Liked by 1 person

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